life and living

My thoughts are sticky mess. I keep trying to take one out to examine it, but it will not leave its kin. A lot of life has happened in the last few days. And yet, it is just life. Nothing I am not used to. I have been practicing living for awhile now. Somehow, however, I round a corner and everything feels foreign again. Like the laws of physics have changed and gravity has a different tug and the science of living is not what it once was. None of my equipment and formulas and expectations are relevant anymore. Or maybe the laws of metaphysics.

But there's hope. I do not know what I am hoping for, but I think that it is enough to know that hope is alive. It is not certain or else it would be fact and well past hope. I am through the meat of my mechanic's certification, which is a milestone I have long been looking at with uncertainty. I know I am ready for something new. I do not do well with the formulaic life anyhow. A life I could transcribe from a textbook would never be big enough, rich enough, or otherwise worthwhile. So here we go. Onward.